Fic: Weaponless Fight (Buffy/Bones)
Apr. 21st, 2006 10:10 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
maevebranTitle: Weaponless Fight
Author: Maeve Bran
Rating: K+
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, I'm just borrowing them for a little fun.
Challenge: #38 - Weapons
Crossover: Bones
Summary: Willow writes an e-mail to Buffy about her new job in DC..
Notes: Set in my slightly AU season 5 Angelverse. Set after "Introducing Willow, the Squint".
Buffy-
Yesterday at work, I did a bad thing. I started a pointless debate. It still rages even though Dr. Brennan tries to squash it.
It all started because Angela, Zach, Hodgins and I were sitting up in the lounge waiting for Booth and Brennan to bring us a new case. We were just hanging out and I was bored. So I started thinking. (You know how I have too many thoughts.) It occurred to me to ask the others the question I was thinking. So I blurted out, "If cavemen and astronauts got into a fight, who would win?"
There was a moment of silence while the others contemplated this. Zach then asked, "Are there weapons involved?"
I said, "No. No weapons."
More contemplation.
"Astronauts would clearly win because they would conspire together and treachery wins every time," answered Dr. Hodgins, being the conspiracy theorist that he is.
"Cavemen would win," answered Angela, "because they are in touch with their raw animalistic aggression."
"Astronauts, because they are trained military men." answered Zach.
I remembered the time in college when you turned into CaveBuffy and caused all that havoc with your fellow cavemen, so I answered, "Cavemen, because they don't need weapons. They just use whatever is around them as weapons."
The argument lasted for a half hour, until Booth and Brennan came up to the lounge. They looked at us strangely, because by that time it was a heated discussion and we were all shouting.
Booth did that loud attention-getting-whistle thing and the shouting stopped. Then he asked what we were discussing so loudly… and everyone looked at me.
"If cavemen and astronauts got into a fight, who would win?" I explained sheepishly.
Booth thought for a moment and then asked, "What are they using as weapons?"
"No weapons," the rest of us chorused.
Booth appeared to think seriously and then answered, "Cavemen, because they're instinctual fighters."
At this, Angela started to smirk smugly. Zach was about to explode in indignation, when Brennan stepped in.
"This is highly illogical. Caveman and astronauts do not exist together, so they can not get into a fight." She rolled her eyes in apparent irritation. "Shall we get on with our work? There is a woman in her 20's downstairs that needs identifying, and her murderer needs catching."
Brennan had us there so we shut up and followed her down to our work, but for the rest of the day "Cavemen" or "Astronaut" could be heard whispered under various people's breath. The debate was continued today, too.
My lunch hour is almost over so I'll wrap this up. Next time you talk to Angel, ask him what he thinks. Then have him find out what the rest of the Fang Gang thinks. It's sure to be a hoot.
Willow
(fin)
(x-posted to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
twistedshorts)
Author: Maeve Bran
Rating: K+
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, I'm just borrowing them for a little fun.
Challenge: #38 - Weapons
Crossover: Bones
Summary: Willow writes an e-mail to Buffy about her new job in DC..
Notes: Set in my slightly AU season 5 Angelverse. Set after "Introducing Willow, the Squint".
Buffy-
Yesterday at work, I did a bad thing. I started a pointless debate. It still rages even though Dr. Brennan tries to squash it.
It all started because Angela, Zach, Hodgins and I were sitting up in the lounge waiting for Booth and Brennan to bring us a new case. We were just hanging out and I was bored. So I started thinking. (You know how I have too many thoughts.) It occurred to me to ask the others the question I was thinking. So I blurted out, "If cavemen and astronauts got into a fight, who would win?"
There was a moment of silence while the others contemplated this. Zach then asked, "Are there weapons involved?"
I said, "No. No weapons."
More contemplation.
"Astronauts would clearly win because they would conspire together and treachery wins every time," answered Dr. Hodgins, being the conspiracy theorist that he is.
"Cavemen would win," answered Angela, "because they are in touch with their raw animalistic aggression."
"Astronauts, because they are trained military men." answered Zach.
I remembered the time in college when you turned into CaveBuffy and caused all that havoc with your fellow cavemen, so I answered, "Cavemen, because they don't need weapons. They just use whatever is around them as weapons."
The argument lasted for a half hour, until Booth and Brennan came up to the lounge. They looked at us strangely, because by that time it was a heated discussion and we were all shouting.
Booth did that loud attention-getting-whistle thing and the shouting stopped. Then he asked what we were discussing so loudly… and everyone looked at me.
"If cavemen and astronauts got into a fight, who would win?" I explained sheepishly.
Booth thought for a moment and then asked, "What are they using as weapons?"
"No weapons," the rest of us chorused.
Booth appeared to think seriously and then answered, "Cavemen, because they're instinctual fighters."
At this, Angela started to smirk smugly. Zach was about to explode in indignation, when Brennan stepped in.
"This is highly illogical. Caveman and astronauts do not exist together, so they can not get into a fight." She rolled her eyes in apparent irritation. "Shall we get on with our work? There is a woman in her 20's downstairs that needs identifying, and her murderer needs catching."
Brennan had us there so we shut up and followed her down to our work, but for the rest of the day "Cavemen" or "Astronaut" could be heard whispered under various people's breath. The debate was continued today, too.
My lunch hour is almost over so I'll wrap this up. Next time you talk to Angel, ask him what he thinks. Then have him find out what the rest of the Fang Gang thinks. It's sure to be a hoot.
Willow
(fin)
(x-posted to
twistedshorts)
